Music Comedy Headlines:

Chicago Area Solo Artist Titles New Album "Untitled" To Blow Minds of Blues Fans

Yes, it's hard to believe that Blue Skin Thompkins decided to name his new album "Untitled," but he's been blowing minds for 15 years. "I just realized that I couldn't think of a good title, so by naming it 'Untitled' I basically came up with a title that really isn't a title at all," Thompkins said in a local blues podcast. Thompkins says that he is already working on new material under the tentative album title "Blue Skin Thompkins Sings The Blues."


Man Completes Entire Mad Libs Book by Solely Using the Words "Britney Spears" and Makes Comedy History

Dan Clark, of Petaluma, CA said this in response to his amazing comedy feat. "I was thinking of putting 'booger' in a couple places and 'fart' would have been perfect for some verbs, especially on page 12, which dealt with a man ordering soup in a restaurant, but I resisted. I only used 'Britney Spears' and I was glad I did." Mr. Clark is expected to visit the White House later this week at the direct invitation of President Bush.




Paul Mc Cartney has just conceded that he released album "Memory Almost Full" at Starbucks because his "bank account is almost empty" since his divorce from Heather Mills.

American Idol so-called talent, Kelly Clarkson with regard to her lame album "My December" just wont admit it to herself that the reason she got canned by her ex boyfriend is that she’s fat and ugly.


Britney Spears + Lindsay Lohan = Britsay Spearhan

Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan are considering Siamese Twinoperation to meld their bodies and sagging careers together while being able to single-handedly cut down embarassing and unflattering media coverage and news stories by 50%. The new entity, called "BRITSAY SPEARHAN" will undergo cosmetic "binding" as early as this Fall. A Dr. Parheet Gupta, a famed plastic surgeon in Beverly Hills, has simply said "no comment" in regards to being able to successfully combine their ailing careers.

Sensing a vacant hole in general public disgust with the hip-hop world and musicians in general, Rob VanWinkle a.k.a. Vanilla Ice, is planning a full out comeback next Spring with a new album, new movie, and new ice cream. The "Ice Flava" album is being distributed by Def Jelly Rekurds and will be tied into the Summer release of 'Nilla's new movie, "Vanilla's Ice Age - Glacial Flava," his publicist said. With all that Vanilla dropping next summer, Vanilla Ice decided to also promote his new Hagen Das ice cream flavor "Ice Flava Crunch" which combines white chocolate chunks, vanilla ice chips, and vanilla ice cream.

Michael Jackson, no stranger to stranger than strange news, has been off the media radar for a while now with his move over seas. However, recent rumors reveal Jacko is working hard on a new brand of cookies. "Michael Jackson's Boy Scout Cookies." These thrilling cookies would have Billie Jean's panties all in a bunch. The cookies have been rumored to carry such wacko Jacko names and flavors as: Li'l Lad Lovin Drops (crunchy chocolate coated wafers in a variety of boy body part shapes), Sleepover Sandies (buttery cookies with a sinful secret inside - a chocolate hand), and Thin Hints (a whisper soft coating of mint chocolate over a chocolate cookie shaped like a boy on his knees). "Michael Jackson's Boy Scout Cookies" may be just a rumor, but you can count on us to get the first bite of news on that one!

Today in the news, Jay Z has left Beyonce for R & B Sultry Songstress Rihanna after Beyonce found rubbers and semen on an umbrella Rihanna left as Jay Z's Manhattan apartment.

Skaterboy, girl Avril Lavigne, finally admits she's hot and that's the only reason her music sells.

Rapper 50 cent, says his latest album, "Curtis" has left him "short-changed" and he's upping his name to 75 cent and releasing a new improved album. Lemonem has no connect. Either does Dr. Gay.


Today in the news, MC Sampler gets sued by MIMS for parodying his misogynistic, demeaning song "This is Why I¹m Hot." He claims MC Sampler "This is Why I¹m Shot" is racist. MIMS is absolutely right.

Also in the news, Mariah Carey underwent surgery to remove a canary that was embedded on her vocal chords that was enabling her all these years to hit those high notes...they have dubbed the little canary "Mariah Canary;" it is available for sale at a pet shop in the East Village.

Also in the news, in Paul McCartney¹s new album, "Memory Almost Full," Paul admits he died a month ago and he has benefited from taxidermy and been stuffed in order to appear live at his performances around the world.

It has just been conceded that 70¹s disco music has finally died...again......yes, Disco music had a made a re-appearance, but finally succumbed to too much drugs, and had slipped on its polyester pants while partying at Poly-Esthers Bar in the Village. Punk Rock has no comment."

In further Paul McCartney related News, Heather Mills has sued Paul again for custody of his right leg; she has won his leg in a lawsuit and he must have it severed and reattached to her by August 31 or be threatened with losing visitation rights from his daughter. Wow, that marriage really did cost him an arm and a leg!